Five moments we’ll always cherish from Gavin WIlliamson’s time as defence secretary
Historians will look back on former defence secretary Gavin Williamson as one of the more colourful figures in Theresa May's Cabinet.
Read more: Defence secretary Gavin Williamson ousted from cabinet over Huawei leak
Williamson, who was last night sacked over allegations he leaked information from a top secret security meeting, experienced a series of gaffes during his time as defence secretary, earning him the nickname 'Private Pike', after the hapless Dad’s Army character.
The fireplace salesman-turned-politician became known for his pet tarantula Cronus, named after the Greek god who castrated his father and ate his children, and gained a reputation for tactless comments.
Here are some of Private Pike’s best moments:
1. When he told Russia to “go away and shut up”
At the height of Britain's biggest diplomatic incident in a decade, Williamson acted like a petulant child having a fight with a friend from school.
Asked what he would say to Russia in the aftermath of the Novichok poisoning of former Russian spy Sergei Skripal and his daughter Julia last year, the newly-anointed defence minister said:
“It is absolutely atrocious and outrageous what Russia did in Salisbury. We have responded to that. Frankly, Russia should go away, it should shut up.”
At the time Williamson was being tipped as a possible successor to Theresa May, but perhaps sadly, fate has decided to spare us the sight of him as Prime Minister.
2. When he suggested guns should be mounted on tractors
Williamson was accused of having "lost the plot" when he made one of his more creative suggestions to solve an equipment crisis in August 2018.
Facing a shortfall of £20bn in the Ministry of Defence's equipment budget, Williamson presumably started drawing on the walls in a feverish, inspired rush of genius to hatch a plan to plug the gap.
His ideas reportedly included mounting "really expensive" guns on tractors and buying old ferries to turn them into beach assault craft. He also wanted to disguise mobile missile defence systems as Coca-Cola lorries.
3. When he was ‘heckled’ in the Commons by his own phone
Addressing the House of Commons from the despatch box is a time-honoured tradition for government ministers, looking out over a sea of hostile faces as MPs wait until the least polite moment to attempt to interrupt.
But Williamson's iPhone beat members of parliament to the punch in July 2018 as he updated the House on the fight against Isis.
As he spoke, his smartphone helpfully chimed in to say: "I found something on the web for 'in Syria, Syrian democratic forces supported by…'"
Speaker John Bercow labelled it a "very rum business", and Williamson was forced to apologise.
Private Pike was trying to make a speech about IS forces in Syria when he was rudely interrupted by his own iPhone.
4. When he proposed firing paintballs at Spanish ships
A foolproof plan to splatter Spanish vessels into submission if they trespassed into Gibraltar's waters was first reported by the Sun in January 2019.
Williamson's brainwave, outlined during a meeting with senior defence staff, was intended to scare away Spain's military by arming locals with paintball guns and pitting them against navy guns.
(Source: Getty)
Had the plan not been shredded by military chiefs at the meeting, England could have seen an encounter with the Spanish Armada to rival the sea battles of the 16th century.
5. When he got in a feud with Good Morning Britain’s Richard Madeley
Filling in on Good Morning Britain, Richard Madeley decided to derail a planned chat with Gavin Williamson about an anti-poaching drive he was on TV to promote to confront him about his "Trump-esque" comments about Russia.
Despite asking Williamson four times about whether the minister regretted his language, Williamson refused to answer Madeley, leading the presenter to "terminate" the chat.
The altercation played out in front of roaming African elephants at the West Midlands Safari Park in Worcestershire.