The Capitalist: Tory Conference; sex in the City; matters of quizness
Dispatches from Tory Party Conference, recruitment turns steamy and more: catch up on the latest City gossip in this week’s edition of The Capitalist
TUGEND-TAT
The mood in Birmingham was surprisingly buoyant for a party that’s just experienced a historic election defeat. Could it be the sweet release of opposition, a bad start for Labour or the excitement of a leadership race which saw Robert Jenrick, James Cleverly, Kemi Badenoch, Tom Tugendhat and their entourages marching the halls showering delegates with lanyards, badges and tote bags?
Candidates’ capacity for innovation was certainly on display in their merchandise, if not their policies, with ‘We Want Bobby J’ baseball caps and waggling foam fingers showing an optimistic attempt to bring American glamour to the Midlands conference hall. Certainly, if elections were won by memorabilia alone, Tugendhat would be a shoo in. “New Tomference merch just dropped,” he xeeted on Monday, with a video of him flaunting a Tudend-hat and Tugend-t-shirt with a conference glow presumably courteous of Tugend-tan (repackaged St Moritz, according to The Capitalist’s sources). Clearly, the leadership hopeful, who also served M&M’s printed with his own face at his leadership launch event, has been making full use of the extra free time that comes with opposition. Fellow candidate Kemi Badenoch was more frugal, whacking ‘Kemi’ stickers on apples in a supposed bid to reference her ‘Renewal’ campaign (“because apples are fresh”). Her team said they were popular (“we had to restock them today”) despite initial derision.
Conventional campaign tactics (pamphlets) were also upgraded, at least in name, with both Tugendhat and Jenrick handing out their own conference ‘newspapers’. The Capitalist took a flick through – (a frontpage QR code to the dad-disco-themed TugendTRACKS playlist and a mistake-ridden sudoku were among their respective highlights) but will be sticking to Morning Wire for engaging reading material.
Meanwhile, MPs, policy wonks and activists enthusiastically debated the future of the party, the meaning of Conservatism and the glories of Margaret Thatcher at packed fringe events. All very enjoyable for Tory true believers, but less hopeful for those who just want a capable opposition. The hordes of lobbyists who were so conspicuous at Labour party conference were largely absent and corporates had pulled sponsorship from numerous events, forcing delegates to pay for their own drinks. Bad signs for the party of business.
STICK THAT IN YOUR PIPE
Keir Starmer’s insistence that he’s prepared to be unpopular is verging on the masochistic, and if he wants to do something truly divisive the tax gurus at the IFS have an idea. The think-tank’s boss Paul Johnson was asked this week whether there were any taxes which, if cut, would immediately boost the Treasury’s finances. His answer? “Tobacco duty.” To be fair, he didn’t say he was advocating for such a move, but it’s a punchy idea. On the one hand the pearl-clutching public health lobby would be apoplectic but, on the other, billions would flood into that black hole we hear so much about as smokers abandon the £4bn-a-year black market for dodgy discount fags. The Capitalist would call this a win-win.
EX-MP FOR HIRE
Speaking of Conservatives with time on their hands, former MP Jonathan Gullis told Times Radio this week that the post-parliamentary job hunt was proving gruelling, with the former teacher unable to find work three months on from the election. “I’ve applied for a few jobs and sadly not even had an interview yet,” he told Hugo Rifkind, adding that it had become more difficult due to the number of “activists in the classroom” pursuing the “very rapid woke agenda”.
SEX AND THE CITY
Mixing work and pleasure is always fraught, but especially so when done in front of a streetside office window under fluorescent lighting on Eastcheap on a Thursday night. Such was the discovery of two diligent workers doing “overtime” in the office of a City recruitment firm last week, whose late-night – um – canoodling was captured on video by revellers below and sent to The Sun. But it was a stride of pride not walk of shame for the bouncing duo come Friday morning, with one of the compromised individuals welcomed back to the office with a cheer, according to The Capitalist’s sources. They do say recruitment is all about relationship building.
QUIZNESS WITH PERSONALITY
Elsewhere in the Square Mile, our finance-trivia-devoted reporters were having just as much fun last Thursday at the FT Alphaville annual pub quiz. The Capitalist, as ever, was in the spotlight, with a question about Morning Wire erupting a mix of cheers and boos from its adoring fans. The joke was on them though, with Morning Wire team Quizness With Personality nabbing a respectable fourth place out of 25 teams (despite missing their industrious news editor, who was unable to attend last minute due to a breaking story at The Crosse Keys). Special shout-out to last place finishers Jackson Hoes, who, despite losing, did manage to have the second best team name.