Worst corporate jargon of the week: Touch base
Every one of us has been on an email chain which is borderline unintelligible for the amount of corporate lingo thrown in there. At Morning Wire, we’re taking a stand and calling out the worst jargon which travels around the City faster than you can drink an overpriced pint. This week: touch base
What does it mean?
To make contact with someone, that’s it. There’s an implication of brevity, but regular recipients will understand that this is often an illusion.
Who uses it?
High energy corpora-jocks who you likely don’t want to be touching anything with. Users can be found lunging through the office and may describe themselves as having ‘golden retriever energy’.
Offence rates are known to spike through December and January, with catching up after the long Christmas break (that’s a week) deemed imperative in corporatopia.
Should we be worried?
More than ever. “Let’s touch base in January” echoed in your ears as you woke up in cold sweats with your New Year’s hangover. No more writing things off until after the birth of Christ, oh no: it’s time to circle back.
What could it be confused with?
- Rounders/baseball
- High school games of never have I ever
How do we get rid of it?
Hit that ball out of the park and, with worthy straightforwardness, just say what you need to say. Skip past those bases so quickly they barely register your touch. And whatdyaknow, it’s a home strike!
Corporate ick rating: 6.5/10
It’s not egregious, but it’s far from encouraged by Morning Wire‘s esteemed comment desk. Keep your touches to yourselves and your bases to your sports sessions, and we will all rest a little easier at night.